Goodbye, Farewell

11 Dec 2011 morning is the day our dear family cat passed on. She was at least 15 human years old. 15 years ago a cat secretly left her 5 kittens at our home without our knowledge and left them with us. We grew attached to all but could not keep them and gave away 3 and kept the ones that were less likely to be adopted with crooked tails and ordinary colored coat. One later never came back and [K] has been with us since. She was petite, rarely meowed, intelligent and was a special cat to us. I remember how she used to run crazily up and down the house playing and playing hide with her and how she much enjoyed herself. And I remember how I used to walk at the end of the street to head somewhere for while, she would follow me, stopped and called sadly to me when I made a quicker exit to prevent her from following any further - when I walked back, she would always be waiting and popping excitedly from her hiding place at the end of that street to greet me and followed me home. I went away for my studies and it was great to come back to her.

Living away from the family home the last few years made for fewer opportunities to see her. And with the boys born even lesser opportunities. Even so, I still loved her heaps and news of her unwell and occassionally missing but found worried and saddened me. But when news and signs of her age catching up came.... I know I should see her and at least say goodbye to her...
The news alone of her not eating, getting weaker and towards the end barely being able to walk really saddened me. The thought of her, news of her, and picture updates of her just made me very sad and teary eyed and I tried not to think about it when there were ppl around me. When the news came that her time was almost near, I knew the right thing to do was to see and say goodbye..... but I know that I cannot bear to see her so weak and would just be a wreck before and if I were to see her. And when the inevitable news came, again I could not bring myself to see her before she was buried.

I wished I could say goodbye to her personally but I would just be too unbearably sad as I already am. So goodbye and farewell [K].... will be missing you and your presence. The thought of you brings wonderful memories. Hope your life with us was the best. You were well loved by us all. Am sorry I couldn't see you for the last time. But know that goodbye to you is one of the hardest things we had to do.

Goodbye and farewell [K]